Grace

It was a Monday morning and I was busy getting four kids ready for school and myself ready for work.  Looking back now, it seems like the smallest, inconsequential issues, but for whatever reason I lashed out harshly at my kids.  Not once, but twice.  I stopped to confess and apologize after the first time.  But not even 10 minutes later, I failed again.  As you can imagine, the self-talk started up immediately.  “They’re going to remember this forever”; “No one else I know lashes out at their kids like I just did”;  “I am a horrible mother”;  “How could I have just finished my time in the Word and not 1 hour later already have failed so miserably?”  “I am not worthy to work at a church, in children’s ministries of all things.”   Even after apologizing for a second time I could feel the weight of my sin, the guilt, the shame, the regret.  We loaded up into the car and as I turned the car on, the song ‘Grace Wins’, by Matthew West started playing.   This song is one that my girls have been learning for Joy Kids choir, but in this moment, this song was for me.    
“There's a war between guilt and grace
And they're fighting for a sacred space
But I'm living proof
Grace wins every time”
God blessed me by reminding me that through His transforming power, Grace wins every time.  I am a work in progress, ever-changing and growing in my relationship with Him.  God also allowed me to use this opportunity to provide a very practical example to my children, bringing to life the lyrics of a song that they have been learning to sing.  Though I wish I had behaved differently on this morning, I am so thankful for the way God redeemed this situation.  My kids are going to sin, fail, and royally mess up at times, but because of God’s love for us and His grace, they don’t have to carry around the weight of that guilt and shame.  And hopefully, after the morning’s events, they understand that more than ever.  They are made new in Christ, redeemed and set free. 
Stephanie Thorp



Pastor's Book Recommendation:
Heaven, by Randy Alcorn    
The best book on heaven I have ever read.  It is biblically grounded, fascinating to ponder and as with all Alcorn books wonderfully written.